Session 7 – Personal Plan Overview Workshop

Action Steps

1. Download the SIMPLE Personal Life Plan using the link under “Downloads”.

2. Complete page 9, Who is there?

3. Complete page 10, How do you want to be remembered?

Session Transcript

Welcome back to Guidestone University.

In this session, we are going to begin working through the SIMPLE Personal Plan tool. If you haven’t downloaded it yet, pause the session here and download it so you have it in front of you, or pull it up on your screen. The tool is a fillable form you can complete on your computer.

So, we’re going to look at the personal plan tool. Several years ago, I read a book that profoundly impacted the way that I think about life and business planning. It’s called E-Myth Revisited. The book became a classic for small business. It’s about why many small businesses fail.  And so many of you would say, “Why do you want to read a book like that?” But it has some great, great information in it. There’s one place in the book, and you’ve probably heard this exercise before, but I want to read it for you. It just takes a few minutes. I want us to work through this exercise together. Kind of new and fresh – a new take on it.

So, for the next few minutes I’m going to read and excerpt from this book, it’s just a few short paragraphs long, so you can put down your pen and listen. In fact, if you want to sit back and close your eyes and think about what I’m getting ready to read to you that will make more meaningful and impactful for you.

So, here’s what Michael Gerber wrote, “Imagine that you’re going to attend the important occasions of your life. It’s going to be held in the room that large enough to see. All of your family, and friends, and business associates, anyone and everyone who’s important to you and to whom you are important. “ You get that picture?

The walls are draped with deep golden tapestry, and the lighting is subdued and soft. It’s casting a warm glow on the faces of your expectant guests. The chairs are upholstered with handsomely matching fabric, and the carpet is deeply piled. The front of the room was a platform, and on the platform, is a large, beautifully decorated table that has candles burning in both end, and on the table, in the center is a box. It’s the object of everyone’s attention this large, shining ornate box.

And in the box, is you. Can see yourself lying in the box? There’s not a dry eye in the room, and he wrote that, “Among everyone that showed up are the people who mattered most to you. Who are they? Who is there? “

When I first read that portion of the book I was like, “Man, that’s a morbid thought.” Well, he wasn’t thinking about their own funeral.” Here’s what I want us to do in a few minutes. I want us to take a few minutes and think through, “Who is there?” In fact, you might want to pause the recording right now and just right down, “Who is there?” You don’t have to write down the name of every single person, again you can write down groups of people, but think about who is there?

So, when I made this list, here are the people that were on my list. I wrote down my wife, my daughter, my son, my friends, my colleagues, my family, my parents, that’s the action list that I’ve started with – it was my original list.

So, here’s what Michael Gerber says in the book. He continues, he writes his paragraph, “Now imagine that these people – the people that we just wrote down, who are most important to you. Imagine that they have five minutes to speak, what did they remember most about you, and what do they appreciate most? What did your life mean to them? What impact did it have? What have they lost with your passing?”

So, after reading that question in the book, I actually took the time to write out exactly how I wanted to be remembered by each person. I wrote out what I want them to say in my funeral. How I want them to remember me. Now, you have your list that you wrote down already in the personal plan tool. Who will be there? So, you have that list.

Next action is to write down, what will they say? We’re going to list each person, the people who are there, and we’re going to write what would we like for them to say about me at my funeral, what would they remember most about me, what impact did they have in my life, and what did they lost with my passing? You’re going to do that for you, for each person that you wrote down. So, pause the session right here and do that. You got your list of people who are there, and for each of the people who are there you’re going to write how you want to be remembered by them or what they will say at your funeral.

So, here’s an example. Here’s what I wrote for my wife, for Sarah.

I want Sarah to remember that I understood her, and then I helped her accomplish her dreams. I want her to recall the specific times that we’ve spent together. When we laughed, when we cried, when we sat silently, when we held each other, when we talked about things that were important to us, when we spent time together with our kids. I want her to remember that we’re always looking for adventure. That we were deeply in love and romantically intimate. I wanted her to remember that she was happy, and I made her smile every single day.

Here’s another example for my daughter, Madison, I wrote, “I want Madison to remember that we’ve spent time together regularly. On dates, riding bikes, hiking, taking walks, talking about saving and spending, discovering and pursuing her dreams together, reading and praying, playing soccer, doing chores and planning business ideas. I want her to remember how much I loved her, and how much I loved her mom, and how much I loved her brother. I want her to remember that I regularly told her she’s lovely, she’s exquisite and she’s chosen. I want her to be radiant with affection, and to remember how she sought me out to love on me.”

Now, I’ve a little confession to make. I cheated a little bit. I’ve had about eight years to write it and rewrite it. So, it didn’t look like that the first time I wrote it. So, if yours doesn’t look exactly like that, don’t sweat it. You’re good. In fact, I’m positive that what you’ve written down are far better than what I wrote the first time.

Here’s an example, when I first wrote Madison’s eulogy that I want her to have for me, I wrote that, I want her to love me, and I want her to know that I love her. But I went back and changed it months later. I want her to know that I loved her, and I’ll know that she knows that I love her when she’s regularly seeking me out to love on me.

See, we may think that we’re doing something for our children, or towards our colleagues, but if we don’t have kind of assessment or an evaluative way to review it, to reflect on it, then many times it’s not going to happen – that is just one example. I originally wrote it one way, but as I review it on a regular basis, I made a little come back and rewrite some of those things. So, again, don’t get a little caught up on the words – we’re not trying to wordsmithing right here, we’re trying to get things out in our heart.

Now, here’s the good news. You’re not in a box. You’re not dead yet, right? You can still make a difference. When you know what the end should look like, then you can work every day toward that envisioned future.

You can make or create the life that you want for every important relationship, for every important area of your life; no matter where you are in life, no matter how young you are, no matter how old you feel, no matter where you are, you can still make a difference to those who matters most to you. You can still achieve those outcomes. You can take steps today to shape the desired outcomes of your life.

So, the action items for this session are, we’re going to write out in the personal plan tool. Number one, who is there? Number two is what they will say about us. And then we’re going to come back and we’re going to look at those again in the next several sessions. We’re going to use those. It’s going to be like a foundation on what we are going to do in the next session. So, be sure to do that before moving on to the next session.

We’ll see you on the next session![/text_block]